I haven’t created enough Bible studies on Marriage. I have a book called “Different by Design” by
John Macarthur. Below is what it looks
like, along with the main part that I took away from it.
“When
you are content with any food, and offering, any raiment, any climate, any
society, any solitude, any interruption by the will of God;
That
is dying to self.” – Author Unknown
The above quote stuck with me since around 1999. Dying to
self is the main thing I'd say to aspiring husbands and those considering divorce. I’m nowhere near perfect, but whenever I was selfless enough to “die to self”, my wife adores me (don't tell her). The whole poem is as follows:
“When
you are forgotten, neglected, or purposely set at naught, and you don't sting
or hurt with the oversight, but your heart is happy being counted worthy to
suffer for Christ;
That
is dying to self.
When
your good is evil spoken of, when your wishes are crossed, your advice
disregarded, your opinion ridiculed, and you refuse to let anger rise in your
heart or even defend yourself, but take it all in patient, loving silence;
That
is dying to self.
When
you lovingly and patiently bear any disorder, any irregularity, any annoyance;
when you can stand face to face with waste, folly, extravagance, spiritual
insensibility, and endure it as Jesus did;
That
is dying to self.
When
you are content with any food, and offering, any raiment, any climate, any
society, any solitude, any interruption by the will of God;
That
is dying to self.
When
you never care to refer to yourself in conversation or record your own good
works or itch after commendation, when you can truly love to be unknown;
That
is dying to self.
When
you can see your brother prosper and have his needs met, and can honestly
rejoice with him in spirit and feel no envy, nor question God, while your own
needs are far greater and you are in desperate circumstances;
That
is dying to self.
When
you can receive correction and reproof from one of less stature than yourself
and can humbly submit, inwardly as well as outwardly, finding no rebellion or
resentment rising up within your heart;
That
is dying to self.” – Author Unknown
Bible
Verses
I have a long list of Scriptures, but first, I want to
get to the 1’s that applied to me the most. I blame myself for any marital shortcomings because I persuaded her into pre-marital sex.
She grew to overlook trust issues, & eventually saw my committment to God. The following are the
aspects that are the hardest for me because they’re not natural for me.
I had to be more loving and gentle because the “fruit of
the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness” in Galatians 5:22.
Does my wife see me as full of peace? Do my expressions to her seem gentle (as
in tender love)? Am I loving (enough) toward her (in her opinion)?
Love bears all & endures all in 1 Corinthians 13:7, “Beareth
all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” So,
have I shown her that I’m willing to do anything for her trust & security.
Ephesians 5:28-29, “So ought men to love their wives as
their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet
hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the
church.”
There’s a lot more verses below. But the main part is
above. Am I willing to prove to my wife that she is worth far/way more than
anything walking the planet?
More
verses
1 Corinthians 7:27, “Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not
to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.”
“That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love
their husbands, to love their children” in Titus 2:4.
1 Peter 3:7, “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them
according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel,
and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not
hindered.”
Proverbs 31:28, "Her children arise up, and call her
blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”
Colossians 3:18-21, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your
own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not
bitter against them. Children, obey your
parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger,
lest they be discouraged.”
Titus 2:1-8, “But speak thou the things which become
sound doctrine: That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith,
in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as
becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good
things; That they may teach the young
women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good,
obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. In all things shewing thyself a pattern of
good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound
speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be
ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.”
"And He (Jesus) answered and said unto them, 'Have
ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and
female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall
cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no
more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man
put asunder'." - Matthew 19:4-6
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother,
and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” – Genesis 2:24
“Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have
his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” – 1 Corinthians 7:2